Dear PNM’s,

Right now you are just days away from the chaotic, fun, stressful, exciting, scary experience that is sorority recruitment. If you are anything like I was as a PNM, then you are probably feeling a lot of different emotions. I remember being nervous that I wouldn’t find my place, sad about leaving home, excited about being independent, frustrated that the recruitment process felt so long, and cautiously optimistic that my people were waiting for me in one of the chapters on campus. All of those feelings plus about a million more were going on in my head all at the same time. It was overwhelming to say the least.

I’m now about to enter my senior year, and after three years of recruitment, I feel confident that I could give my freshman year self one heck of a pep talk. Since that isn’t really possible, I have decided to give that pep talk here instead in the hopes that someone will read it and feel a little bit better by the end than they did before they started.

There are a few things that I think are important for you to know:

  1. Chapters on this campus want you.

  2. Recruitment is not the end-all be-all.

First of all, chapters on this campus want you. No, chapters on this campus need you.

If every PNM decided “Eh, I don’t want to do this,” sorority life at UK would come to an abrupt halt. You, as a PNM, play the most vital role in recruitment. There can be a place for you here, and the sole purpose of this process is to help you find it.

You deserve your best fit, and the women of the Panhellenic community think so too. Even when it might not feel like it, every decision that the women of our 14 chapters make is made not only in the best interest of each chapter, but also in the best interest of each PNM. The women in this community want you to be happy, even if they don’t see you being happy in their own chapter.

When things get hard or you start to question yourself, I hope you remember that this is about you. It’s not about your roommate or the girl in front of you in the alphabetical order line or the senior in Epsilon Iota Whatever who you thought was so cool. This is about you and finding your home.

Lastly, and maybe most importantly, it’s crucial to remember that recruitment is not the end all be all.

Don’t get me wrong, being an ADPi has absolutely changed my life. Alpha Delta Pi has shaped my college experience so much so that I honestly cannot begin to imagine what the last three years of my life would look like without this chapter. ADPi has enriched my college years with lasting, deeply meaningful friendships. Living as a part of this sorority has given me sisters who feel like family. It has turned me into a more confident, more well-rounded woman than I was three years ago. Through my involvement with ADPi, I have been challenged to use my gifts and talents to make myself, this campus, and the world better. I’ve been exposed to leadership opportunities that I didn’t even know existed as a PNM.

Even still though, I can tell you that while being an ADPi is a massive part of my identity, my recruitment experience is not what made me who I am. My worth is not dependent on the Greek letters I wear, and neither is yours.

The women in this chapter do not love me because I am their sister. Rather, I am their sister because they love me.

This process can feel all-consuming, so I encourage you to take a step back every now and then to remind yourself that you are amazing and beautiful and powerful, and you will still be all of those things no matter how the recruitment process ends for you. With that knowledge, you can walk through this process with confidence and grace. I am rooting for you. Good luck!